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Real dates. Real disasters. |
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My Beer-Brewing Beau by Rachel L. (27, F, Orlando, FL) "I'm a member of a popular online dating site, and I started talking to a guy on there. He looked cute, his emails were witty, and we seemed to have a lot in common. In particular, we both were in to brewing beer, and when he asked if I'd like to meet him at a small, local brewery for a few drinks, I thought it was a great idea. I showed up, and as it turns out, he's not quite as good-looking as his pictures have led me to believe . . . but hey, I'm open-minded, and he has a great personality, right? Turns out, no. First off, when I order my beer, he yells at the bartender not to get what I ordered. He starts lecturing me very loudly on how I shouldn't start the night with a dark beer, because I'll "ruin my palate." He's so loud, people have stopped to see what's going on, and the bartender is just standing there, looking confused. He then attempts to place an order for me, and I have to assure the bartender that, no, I knew what I wanted when I ordered the first time. While the bartender goes to get my drink, my date continues the conversation by telling me that most girls don't know anything about beer, so I "shouldn't feel bad" . . . because, you know, generalizations based on gender are totally cool and accurate. Once we sit down, he notices a tattoo I have on my wrist. I tell him the quick story about it, and I politely ask if he has any. My date then tells me about how he'd like to get a tattoo of his intestines on his stomach. Sensing the perplexed look that has come over my face, he proceeds to tell me--in great detail, leaving nothing to the imagination, at all--about his intestinal problems, the surgery he had to correct said problems, and the recovery from the surgery. Nothing like hearing about your date's colostomy bag. It's delightful, really. Delightful. I politely excused myself, left $10 at the bar, and left."
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